To my very core, I believe boudoir is for everybody and every BODY. First off, it’s always important and interesting to know where terms come from, so let’s take a step back! Originating from France in the 1900s, the term “boudoir” commonly referred to a woman’s private bedroom. Today, the meaning of boudoir has become an umbrella that encompasses a variety of interpretations; one being a photography genre that reflects the expression of self love, self-expression, and documenting our ever changing bodies. 

Society and Toxic Mindset

I don’t know about you but growing up, I was constantly compared to my peers, constantly told I needed to look a certain way, eat a certain amount, or dress a certain way for boys. Overtime, those beliefs of dressing for the male gaze and being stressed out everyday that people would judge me for my eating habits, body rolls, thigh gap (the list goes on and on and on) has been so embedded in my mindset that there is not a single day where I don’t think about it. As the gen Z kids have accurately described it, that toxic mentality is my Roman Empire. (Side story. Something being your roman empire refers to a topic you think of very often, almost if not everyday.) Women would show up on my social feed saying “I don’t get to feel pretty first”, “the way my body looks is always on my mind” and that breaks my heart. That inner monologue that constantly picks at our bodies, along with society telling us we will barely meet the beauty standards is like a sickness! It begins to consume our mindset and affects our quality of life. 

Normalization

So, how does boudoir come into play? How does this “taking of intimate and sensual photos” supposed to help me feel better? All valid questions. Boudoir has helped countless women, even myself, to just normalize our bodies being different. Normalize that we are constructed differently and that itself is beautiful. Normalize that our bodies change because we may give birth, survive an eating disorder, cope with side effects of medicine, health effects, and so on. Have I mentioned normalize? Haha! That is one of the key takeaways I see/hear time and time again. For most if not all women, life will happen, and our bodies adapt to help us move forward and live. Isn’t that just amazing? The women I photograph will look at their images for the first time and it’s like seeing this mental glass shatter, and you can visually see them realize that their bodies are perfectly normal, special to them, and that they are art. 

Representation

As a first generation Chinese-Canadian, boudoir has helped me on my journey of healing my cultural trauma in regards to my body, and I don’t see this conversation brought up enough. Culturally and conventionally, I never saw asian/Chinese women in the media that were more than a size 6-8 and that made me feel less than. I want to be that representation for other women, that no matter the culture or skin tone, you deserve to document yourself. I always tell my clients boudoir has a tangible AND intangible result. You leave with these gorgeous pieces of art that last a lifetime, and your confidence skyrockets. That new found confidence leaks into other parts of your life, you feel more capable, you feel more secure, you feel more sure of yourself. And that feeling never goes away. You can take on the world baby